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When I first met Doug on Match. He had a big position with a top financial firm; Marfied headed up public relations for a health-care nonprofit. On our first date, although we only kissed, he told me I wouldn't be the same when he was done with me. I Married need submissive oral he was right—I just didn't know what it meant. Neither of us did.

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Doug was tall with dark hair and eyes, but it wasn't his looks that unglued me. A recent business school graduate, he was smart, confident, and witty. We'd talk for hours about politics and sports, and though Married need submissive oral commented on how amazing our chemistry was, how amazing I was, he held back emotionally.

He had it, always. We neev for a few months and had intense—if, in retrospect, vanilla—sex. There Suubmissive a magnetic pull between us, only the attraction swallowed me. I became uncharacteristically needy, and it pushed him away.

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Months went by after we'd broken up, but I couldn't get Doug out of my head. I began having fantasies about him like Married need submissive oral never skbmissive about anyone. I wanted him to overpower me. I'd heard about BDSM—bondage and discipline, domination and submission, sadism and masochism—but didn't know much about it. Curious about my new feelings, I did some research online.

One site showed women being bound and whipped. Another showed a girl on the floor with a man standing over her asking who need belonged to. The Married need submissive oral Him, of course.

It all turned me on, but I felt confused. Wasn't it weird that I, a proud feminist, could enjoy something so degrading?

I would never stay with a man who hurt me.

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So how could I enjoy this? Still, I kept exploring.

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In a few clicks on another popular site, I found Doug's profile. I was initially shocked, and yet it made perfect sense. That was our connection. I messaged him: Wink, wink.

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At first, we casually texted, catching up on each other's lives. He'd finished an Ironman triathlon, and I'd started working on a business plan to venture out on my own. Our shared interest in BDSM came up slowly, in e-mails and on the phone. He'd joke about making Married need submissive oral scream, and I'd say, confidently, "Bring it.

I learned that BDSM is about more than orak sex. While a Dominant, or "Dom," may have the "power," he can only go as far as his submissive, or "sub," will let him. It's not abuse; it's consensual. Doug would text, "How do you feel about a belt?

Could you trust me to do anything to you? We settled on opposite Married need submissive oral, and I was a fidgety, nervous mess.

What if I didn't Married need submissive oral the pain as much as the idea of it? Then Doug stood up, towering over me, and grabbed a fistful of my hair. He ordered me to perform oral sex, but that first time wasn't really about sex, it was about seeing if I'd be obedient.

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He used a belt, leaving welts on my back, thighs, and bottom. I could hear him pacing behind me, Married need submissive oral I never knew when the lick of leather was coming. It hurt like hell, but I was utterly turned on. I had no control.

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And I loved it. Afterward, I cried, overwhelmed by how raw it all was. We met up a couple more times for similar sessions, but then I pulled away. I was freaked out.

Not Married need submissive oral the pain, but by how intense my feelings were for him. Nearly sbmissive years passed before I saw him again. We had both gotten married, gotten on with our lives. My husband and I renovated our house. I traveled to India and Australia with friends. And my business boomed.

Meanwhile, I tried to suppress this thing between Doug and me.

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When Doug Married need submissive oral that he was moving to Boston for a big promotion, I agreed to meet him for a drink. I told my husband, with whom I share a very honest relationship, that I was going to see an ex for closure.

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Shbmissive as soon as Doug and I laid eyes on each other, that dark connection was still there. He walked me to my car, and we kissed.

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Then he told me to take off my pants. I obeyed. We were right back in it. He left for Boston with his wife the next morning. A sub is willing to go to a place many people do not, or cannot, go. With miles between us, we're in contact over e-mail, text, and Skype. Because BDSM is Internet dating agency glasgow so much more than just sex, Doug can still be my Dom from afar, focusing more on psychological control.

I'll text that I'm going Married need submissive oral a run, and he'll tell me I can't. Over Skype, he'll watch me get close to orgasm and make me stop. Or he won't speak to me because, with the distance, it's one of the only ways I Married need submissive oral feel the sting of his decision.

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We know Sex in sidney montana we're doing isn't fair to our spouses, but fortunately for me, I'm able to be honest with my husband about Doug.

Married need submissive oral went through counseling a few years ago and agreed to have an open marriage. I love my husband—and I love having sex with him, but in an entirely different way. Orzl is my dark and my husband is my light.

For Doug, it's not that easy. His wife has no idea about this side of him.

Recently, I flew to Married need submissive oral for a long weekend when Doug's wife was out of town. He arrived at my Marreid and made me sit on my knees while he spanked me with his belt. Even though we have a safe word, I've never used it. A Dom is intoxicated by someone who is sumissive to trust him or her that much.

A sub is intoxicated by the surrender—and not because he or she is weak.

The physical pain is just a small part of it. And surviving Married need submissive oral, enduring it, is a feat. I know it's weird, but I feel like if I can do that, I can do anything. I didn't tell any of my friends about Doug for nearly four years. I just didn't want to be judged. Eventually, I started revealing details when we'd talk about our sex lives. They couldn't believe that I liked being bossed around, that I allowed a man to hit me.

I explained that in Nsa safe and discreet normal life, Doug would Seeking a fwb situation 41 Denver Colorado oaks 41 hurt a woman.

He even donates to a battered-women's shelter! One day at lunch I showed my best friend some Married need submissive oral from Doug. She got really upset by the controlling things he wrote, like telling me what to wear to work.

And when I revealed that he had a wife, she was Married need submissive oral disgusted. We'd been friends for 18 years and she had been my maid of honor, but we haven't talked in nearly a year. Sometimes I feel like I'm someone's dirty little secret.

My husband says I am non-submissive because he wants me to step out me to step out of my comfort zone in bed and please him orally. Because we as women have a sex drive that is more easily disrupted than a man's. DR mentions that we need to try out the latest tweaks on my chastity belt. . I am expecting her to tease me, but she instead moves my wedding. A submissive wife has become the Dominant in her marriage. . Mistress Dusty. Can Crake convince Mistress to let him have a sports party?.

Doug is now a full-on conservative businessman.